


you don't gotta die (lemme tell you why)

by kahlen369



Category: Riverdale (TV 2017)
Genre: Aftermath, Bullying, F/F, Friendship, Gen, Grief, Hurt/Comfort, Mental Health Issues, Slow Burn, Suicidal Thoughts, Suicide Attempt
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-10-09
Updated: 2017-10-09
Packaged: 2019-01-15 05:55:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,050
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12315075
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kahlen369/pseuds/kahlen369
Summary: There’s a split second where she thinks about going to the Jubilee, where she thinks of another redhead and the unspoken promise between them, but then, Cheryl sniffles a little, her fingers still trembling around her mug of hot cocoa---and it isn’t really a choice at all.-In the aftermath, Veronica decides tostay





	you don't gotta die (lemme tell you why)

**Author's Note:**

> Another stab at a fix-it for this moment, because seriously, why would she go?? This can be read as platonic Cheronica, because it's really just about friendship and being there for each other at this point
> 
> Title inspired by the Logic song, 1-800-273-8255

Cheryl trying to drown herself is a wakeup call, the tectonic plates of her worldview shifting with the force of a revelation.

 

It’s the day Veronica came home to the news of her father’s arrest, and her entire world was shattered.

 

It’s the night mother and daughter first moved to Riverdale, ghosts of the past all around them, despite both their claims of a new life.

 

It’s Ethel’s father in the hospital of something her own flesh and blood had done.

 

It’s a voice in her heard saying, _your fault_ , and the knowledge that she could’ve done so much more.

 

-

_Thanks for trying._

-

 

But Veronica isn’t sure she tried _enough_.

 

Not when she can still hear the terrible crack of the ice, feel the freezing cold like a vice on her skin, see Cheryl’s pale face a thousand times paler.

 

 _Damned by faint praise_ , she thinks, and feels sick to her stomach.

 

She’s been trying so hard to be a better person, to be the kind of girl who cares about other people and helps them out, to be more than the spoiled heiress who didn’t think twice about bullying another person just because she could.

-

But she’s _different_ now.

-

 

Certainly, there were missteps and setbacks, yet, for the most part, Veronica Lodge 2.0 has been a stunning upgrade from the previous model in terms of her moral standing---to the point that she could even be called, in non-sarcastic terms, as maybe, a good person.

 

Except, evidently, when it comes to _Cheryl_.

 

In hindsight, Veronica can admit she’s slipped back into old habits far too easily when it comes to handling the HBIC of Riverdale. If she’s honest with herself, the fact of the matter is, Cheryl had reminded her a little too much of her old self, and she’d lashed out at that. No one likes to see the worst parts of themselves on display, after all.

 

( _There are ghosts everywhere in Riverdale, and it’s not only the dead that haunt the living--_ )

 

Wrapped up in her own issues, she hadn’t been able to see any of Cheryl’s, even when they’d all but been shoved in her face.

 

-

_Thanks for trying._

-

 

Veronica _tried_ , certainly. But, how hard? For the most part, her few attempts to reach out to the redhead were been half hearted and filled with ulterior motives. Sure, she offered a shoulder to cry on once, but what about every time after?

 

She was in that house, at that dinner table and seen exactly what shaped Cheryl Blossom into the devil in Riven Vixen clothing the world saw her as. She’d seen the emptiness in those eyes, what the loss of losing Jason had done to her.

 

That kind of grief and brokenness didn’t just go away. She knew that better than anyone, and she still let herself get sucked into a petty fight after fight because it was easier.

 

Veronica ignored the signs that something was wrong, didn’t bother to hear the cries for help that they were all along.

 

_Well, not anymore._

 

This time, she is going to try _harder_.

 

-

So, in the aftermath, when her mother asks, she _stays_.

-

 

There’s a split second where she thinks about going to the Jubilee, where she thinks of another redhead and the unspoken promise between them, but then, Cheryl sniffles a little, her fingers still trembling around her mug of hot cocoa--- _and it isn’t really a choice at all._

 

-

Her mother leaves them alone, and then, it’s just the two of them in front of the fire, in not quite entirely comfortable silence. The heat from the flames prickles at her skin, but she still feels too cold, and she suspects Cheryl feels the same way.

 

What are you supposed to say when someone has just tried to kill themselves? When that same someone meant to send you the equivalent of a suicide note?

 

Veronica hasn’t ever been someone lacking in words or verbosity, but this is something else. There’s no witty quip or pithy saying to fill the silence here. No easy way to solve this problem.

 

Now, after all the immediate help has been given, after all her initial reflection is over, she’s faced with the fact that, despite all her internal promises of doing better this time--Veronica has no idea what the fuck she is doing.

 

This is fragile, uncertain territory, and she’s afraid of making things _worse_.

 

 _She did such a bang up job the first time, after all,_ the Latina thinks, with more than a little bitterness.

 

-

_Thanks for trying._

-

 

The words play through her mind again, and Veronica resolves to try to offer some kind of comfort to makeup for what she did (or _didn’t_ do, in this case), but she can find it in herself to say something that isn’t completely trite or terrible, Cheryl breaks the silence.

 

“You should go.” Her voice is a little hoarse, but the words are unmistakable.

 

“ _What?_ ” Those, of course, are the first words Veronica’s spoken to Cheryl, outside the barebones explanation of where the bathroom and the towels are.

 

“You don’t need to stay with me. I’m… _fine_.” The words are delivered with a smile that looks more like a grimace, so the brunette doubts the veracity immediately.

 

Shaking her head, Veronica reassures back, with a comforting smile, “And _I’m_ fine, with not going to the Jubilee.”

 

The redhead looks less than convinced at her reply, so, she adds, trying for a little levity, “I have a dark and mysterious reputation to upload, after all. Not going will keep the masses guessing.”

 

It’s a weak excuse and a terrible joke, but she likes to think those big eyes seem a little less shadowed anyway. Cheryl still doesn’t say anything, but she gives a small nod, and the brunette takes that as enough of an invitation.

 

Veronica shuffles closer, until she’s near enough that she can feel the way the other girl is still shaking, ever so slightly. This close, she can see how the blood still hasn’t quite returned to the redhead’s face, and she’s still entirely too deathly pale.

 

Her heart clenches at the thought, she places her hand over the redhead’s, and squeezes lightly.

 

-

 

Cheryl squeezes _back_ , and she feels like just maybe, she’s doing something right.


End file.
